My most glorious evening

Most of my friendships are what I consider sometime friendships. They are not based on seeing someone often, just every so often. This is no way reflects badly on the friendship, and it is a truly glorious thing to have so much news to catch up on!

I had an unexpected evening out with Kate. I had some free meals at a local restaurant and my daughter who I had intended to go with got a better offer with friends so I was faced with a conundrum. Do I not go, eat out alone, or see if anyone is free. I looked at the menu and made the choice that I was definitely not going to miss this meal. Options two and three were looking good!

I think I was around fifteen when I started doing a lot of things by myself. I think it was cinema first. To me, there is such a delight about going to daytime cinema Often I have been the only person in the cinema, they show the film just for me. Then the meals started. I have always been a prolific reader, so would simply take a book with me, and eat delicious food whilst engaging in some marvellous literary work. Not having a book isn’t a problem either, but I think it makes other people uncomfortable. Sometimes.

One of my most culminative independent activities was going to Stratford-apon-Avon when I was twenty-one. The few day away were planned with the skill of a military logician. I made a series of four cassette mix tapes from all my vinyl to keep me entertained for the multiple hour coach journey. In fairness, they did get dull after four days away, I like lots of variance in my music and four cassette tapes was simply not enough. I stayed in a Posthouse Forte that was most glorious (my own bathroom!) and went to the theatre three times (Cymbeline, Merry Wives of Windsor and Much Ado about Nothing. I also engaged in a night time theatre tour and went to the church that Shakespeare is buried in. Allegedly.

When I want to do something, often it doesn’t occur to me that anyone else would want to join me in said activity. Similarly, I love my friends deeply, think about them often, but only sometimes do I initiate contact or meeting up. My diary is a blurry mess of scribble and sometimes the prospect of putting extra ink onto a page feels heavier than it should. I also know that my friends are just as busy and sometimes I have too much story to tell.

Seeing Kate was awesome, we watched fit and healthy people exit the gym close by as we ate copious amounts of deliciousness. On the way home I bought some nail glue which I then proceeded to cover me and Kate’s floor in (requiring brake fluid and thinner to remove). So other than no longer having nail glue privileges, I had an amazing time.

Map Point.Where in my life can I express myself better?

 

Wonderful walk

I am having the nicest weekend. On Friday I went to the park with my young one, she climbed a tree and I watched, then we made daisy chains. Then a friend came over and we indulged in hot beverages and board games. Today started with a coastal walk to a heritage site, meeting two new people who my usual walking friend invited along. This afternoon was some work and dinner out with my family. Now it is almost time for me and the young one to kick back with a DVD. I don’t quite know what’s in store for tomorrow, but I know it will likely be agreeable too. Sometimes  I feel so amazingly loved

I do alone time really well too. I can happily go to the cinema, or get a meal somewhere, by myself. It never occurs to me that I can’t do these things or need someone else to accompany me. Even as a teenager, going to the theatre on my own wasn’t an issue. When I have decided to embark on something, I am generally really well motivated, or at least mostly.

When I do things with other people it is a conscious choice to engage with others. It is because I know that some people will utterly uplift me and sharing some time with people like that is important. I know that I also serve the same role to others. Good people are good to be around!

Sometimes it is highly needful to have other people around to support you and make sure you are okay. Sometimes we all need that level of endorsement. But when things are good, to have people in your life purely because you enjoy being with them is amazing. It isn’t to fulfil a particular need, it is to completely to enhance yours and their wellbeing.

When I was out this morning, chatting with my friend and her two friends, it felt as if this is what we are meant to be doing. We are meant to make connections. As a group, we kept splitting off in different twos and walking for a ways. Hearing snippets of someone else’s life is a glorious privilege and it offered me new perspectives on my own. I am seeing myself more clearly.

Map Point. Where do I want to go?