Intrinsic passions

Today I have been for my interview at a university to study my masters. I am planning to study ‘the narrative of protest in new media’. And after the next two years, with the university’s acceptance, I will be able to tell everyone precisely what that is. It feels exciting to be able to go back to studying, such a massive privilege.

I have worked with a lot of young people who have not had a positive experience of education. It is an incredible experience for me to watch them really shine when I have explained a concept or taught them a skill. I think it is part of the human experience to want to acquire new skills, but for a lot of people, education can be perceived as something that is ‘not for their thing’.

At my own secondary school, the most engaging, most charismatic, most skilled teachers went to all the higher classes, and anyone who didn’t fit this criteria, got teachers who were marking time and largely disinterested. I varied in my skill levels across subjects so in some subjects I had an advantage, others not so much. I understand why it happens, but it doesn’t help many of the students who need help most.

I find out in two weeks time whether or not I have a place on the course, but at this point, I know that I have done all I can with the most amazing support from my friends, tutors and family, which I appreciate that not everyone has access to. I know that I am utterly blessed.

Being able to learn new things I believe comes from different places. Intrinsic motivation, simply knowing that you want to pursue something is a very lucky place to be. For me, some of what I now love so much comes from seeing that exact same thing through the eyes of another. Aged seventeen I met the most amazing group of people, including two of my favourite people on earth, Brenda and Roy. They took me to galleries, theatre and concerts, and through their most wonderful gift of invitation, I was shown something that I could pursue. I learnt a new way of seeing.

Map Point. Who in my friendship groups inspires me?


My amazing friend

This morning I went to visit my friend Trevor. Trevor is someone who I have known for around fifteen years, he has always been a friend who is guaranteed to give wise counsel, amazing ideas and a somewhat wry sense of humour. He is someone who always uplifts me, he makes me feel good.

This morning I told him about my life, the people I have recently met, how my daughter is doing, this blog and also the current political situation (which is worthy of note!). I also gave him a heads up on what was going on around him, as Trevor is currently in hospital in the ICU. He has many wires and tubes attached. He is aware enough to squeeze my hand but had not yet opened his eyes post surgery. I also talked a bit about the football.

Midway through my visit, there were some bits that needed to be done, so I went to the waiting area. I cried a little bit. Seeing anyone I love in such a situation is hard, but I am reassured that having visitors, irrespective of how much awareness is going on, is important to recovery. I also thought about the things that I am currently stressing over, and what a sharp relief that was. If all I have to worry about is a few letters and phone calls, then my life is indeed very blessed.

I was called back in by the nurse so I could see him again before I left and he opened his eyes. I was blown away. There is something about being able to look into someone else’s eyes, and have them look back into yours that is utterly beautiful. I have every confidence that Trevor will get back to his usual tip-top form as soon as possible, and he is in my thoughts always.

Map Point. Which people do I love spending time with?